Do you know what your true purpose is? While this question may seem overwhelming, it’s worth thinking about. Knowing the answer can help you find more fulfillment in mundane tasks, like straightening up the house after the kids are asleep because you know one of your main goals is to provide a warm and nourishing home environment, or completing a tedious project at work because your efforts will eventually go to making other peoples’ lives easier. (Or provide a paycheck for your family so you can create the life you want, for yourself and the people you love.) It can also help you feel more happy moments.

Life is usually so crammed with obligations (signing up for insurance, attending parent-teacher conferences) and distractions (that constantly blinking BlackBerry), pondering your bigger aim can feel like a Herculean task. The first step, though, is to figure out what your passion is. Your passion is any activity that sustains you, that you turn to when you have a few precious moments or hours of free time, and it leads to purpose, and ultimately to meaning.

Along with my love for my family and friends, my passions are a combination of helping women reach their goals in my work as editor of SELF—inspiring them to be their personal best, however they wish to define it—and in challenging myself through physical feats to see what I can accomplish.

Some people (especially women I admire) have not only identified their purpose, but pursue it with such gusto that they leave me in awe. For instance, Jennifer Goodman Linn, a cancer survivor and one of SELF’s first group of Women Doing Good award winners. Three years ago, she launched Cycle for Survival, an event where teams of riders pedal on indoor cycles to raise money to research cures for very rare cancers, including soft-tissue sarcoma, which she is battling. So far the event has raised a total of $4 million for Memorial Sloan-Kettering to research cures for rare cancers.

Do you know a woman who is working toward her true purpose and helping give back in some meaningful way? Someone who is improving her community, the environment or another aspect of our lives through her tireless contributions? I’d love to hear from you! Nominate your everyday hero for SELF’s annual Women Doing Good awards—or you can nominate yourself! The winner will score a $10,000 donation to her favorite charity, will be featured in the September issue of SELF and will receive a trip to New York City to attend our Women Doing Good awards ceremony. And read SELF every month to find tips, tricks and inspiration to be your best. After all that you do, you deserve it!

by Lucy Danziger and the staff at SELF

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The purpose of this exercise is to create a thought process that will help fine-tune your life’s design and encourage you to focus on specific targets. If nothing else, the following questions should help you dream!

- Real-life strategies that will help you to actually accomplish the goals you set for yourself in 2011 -

New year, new you. It’s the perennial January catchphrase that holds such conquer-the-world promise. And then, well, you get sidetracked with conquering your to-do list. But even the loftiest resolutions (running a marathon, writing a book) don’t have to fall by the wayside come February. Staying motivated―and achieving what you set out to do on that bright New Year’s Day―is surprisingly possible. Just follow these nine mantras, provided by researchers who study motivation and backed up by women who have used them to realize their biggest ambitions.

 1. When you make a plan, anticipate bumps. Before even trying to achieve a goal, target potential pitfalls and troubleshoot them. Peter Gollwitzer, a professor of psychology at New York University, in New York City, says that people who plan for obstacles are more likely to stick with projects than those who don’t. In a 2009 study published in the American Journal of Preventive Medicine, Gollwitzer compared two groups of women who wanted to be more active. Both groups were given information on leading healthy lifestyles. But the second was also taught how to foresee obstacles (example: “The weather forecast is bad, but I’m planning to go for a jog”) and work around them using if-then statements (“If it rains, then I’ll go to the gym and use the treadmill rather than skip exercising altogether”). No surprise, those in the second group fared better. Michelle Tillis Lederman of New York City practiced this strategy when she was writing a book last year. She installed blinds on her home-office door to minimize disruptions and hired an editor to give feedback on each chapter so she wouldn’t get stuck along the way. She also established rules, like checking e-mails only after she had written for two hours. “It was easier to follow this plan,” says Lederman, “than to wrestle with every distraction in the moment.” Her book, The 11 Laws of Likability (American Management Association), will be published later this year.
 
2. Channel the little engine that could―really. A person’s drive is often based on what she believes about her abilities, not on how objectively talented she is, according to research by Albert Bandura, a professor of psychology at Stanford University. His work has shown that people who have perceived self-efficacy (that is, the belief that they can accomplish what they set out to do) perform better than those who don’t. That self-belief is what helped Ingrid Daniels of Newark, New Jersey, leave a stable corporate job to develop a T-shirt line after the birth of her first child. “It never occurred to me I could fail, even though I had no experience,” she says. Today Daniels runs two successful small businesses (the T-shirt company and a line of stationery), which allows her to stay at home with her three children.

3. Don’t let your goals run wild… When your sights are too ambitious, they can backfire, burn you out, and actually become demotivating, says Lisa Ordóñez, a professor of management and organizations at the Eller College of Management, at the University of Arizona, in Tucson. Instead of aiming unrealistically high (such as trying to save enough money for a down payment on a home in six months), set goals that are a stretch but not an overreach (come up with a doable savings plan for your budget).
 
 …But work on them everyday. According to Daniel Pink, author of Drive: The Surprising Truth About What Motivates Us ($15, amazon.com), taking small steps every day will not only help hold your interest in what you’re trying to achieve but will also ensure that you move slowly, but surely, toward your goal. So, for example, set up a down-payment-fund jar and dump your change into it every night. You’ll get a sense of accomplishment each day, to boot.
 
 4. Go public with it. Instead of keeping your intentions to yourself, make them known to many. “Other people can help reinforce your behavior,” says James Fowler, a political scientist who studies social networks at the University of California, San Diego. After all, it’s harder to abandon a dream when you know that people are tracking your progress. Take Stefanie Samarripa of Dallas, 25, who wanted to lose 20 pounds. She created a blog and told all her friends to read it. “I wanted something to hold me accountable,” she says. Samarripa weighs herself weekly and announces the result on Desperately Seeking Skinny (skinnystefsam.blogspot.com). During her first three weeks, she lost six pounds. “People read my updates and make comments, which helps me keep going,” she says.
 
5. Lean on a support crew when struggling. Think of the friends and family who truly want to see you succeed. Enlisting those with whom you have authentic relationships is key when your motivation begins to wane. Choose people who may have seen you fail in the past and who know how much success means to you, says Edward L. Deci, a professor of psychology at the University of Rochester, in New York. For Jane Arginteanu of New York City, support came in the form of her fiancé, Glenn. Arginteanu had smoked from the time she was a teenager and had tried to quit before. When she decided to give it another go, Arginteanu says, “Glenn stood by me and told me, without ever issuing an ultimatum, that he wanted to grow old with me. That was terrific motivation.” A year later, she’s smoke-free.

6. Make yourself a priority. Put your needs first, even when it feels utterly selfish. You will derail your progress if you sacrifice yourself for others in order to please them (such as eating a cupcake that a coworker baked even though you’re on a diet). A few years ago, Karen Holtgrefe of Cincinnati was at the bottom of her own priority list. “I had a demanding full-time job as a physical-therapy manager and was teaching physical therapy part-time,” she says. “Plus, I had a husband and two children to care for.” As a result, she found herself stressed-out, overweight, and suffering from constant backaches. “I hit a wall and realized I needed to make some changes for my sanity,” Holtgrefe says. So she quit the part-time teaching job, joined Weight Watchers, and scheduled nonnegotiable walks six days a week―just for her. In a year, she lost 85 pounds, and her back pain (and stress) disappeared.
 
 7. Challenge yourself―and change things up. It’s hard to remain enthusiastic when everything stays the same, says Frank Busch, who has coached three Olympic swimming teams. To keep his athletes motivated, he constantly challenges and surprises them―adding a new exercise to a weight routine or giving them a break from one practice so they can recharge. Amy Litvak of Atlanta did the same thing. She had several half-marathons under her belt but wanted something new, so she signed up for a series of mini triathlons. “Each race was longer than the last or had a slightly different challenge,” she says. She breezed through them and is now training for a full marathon.
 
 8. Keep on learning. To refuel your efforts, focus on enjoying the process of getting to the goal, rather than just eyeing the finish line. Janet Casson of Queens, New York, set out to teach yoga. She completed her training, but finding a position took longer than anticipated. So she wouldn’t lose steam and become discouraged, Casson used the time to perfect her skills. She attended workshops and studied with different teachers. “It was invigorating and kept me working toward my goal,” says Casson, who now teaches five classes a week.
 
9. Remember the deeper meaning. You’re more likely to realize a goal when it has true personal significance to you, according to Deci. (For example, “I want to learn to speak French so I can communicate with my Canadian relatives” is a more powerful reason than “I should learn French so that I can be a more cultured person.”) And when the process isn’t a pleasant one, it helps to recall that personal meaning. Not all dedicated gym-goers love working out, Deci points out, but because they have a deep desire to be healthy, they exercise week after week. Jennie Perez-Ray of Parsippany, New Jersey, is a good example of this. She was working full-time when she decided to get her master’s degree. However, she knew that pursuing that goal would mean spending less time with her friends and family. “But I was the first person in my family to get a degree, so it was very important to me,” Perez-Ray says. She kept this in mind every evening that she spent in the classroom. Although the sacrifices she made were hard, she reflects, “reaching my goal made it all worthwhile.”

by Lesley Alderman

Switch careers! Find love! Travel the world! Get into shape! Why is it that we can strike little things off our day-to-day to-do lists, but our most heartfelt ambitions manage to elude us year after year? Yes, circumstances can trip us up. But all too often, we unknowingly get in our own way. “We tend to put barriers between our goals and ourselves because we become convinced that we’re either not up to the task of achieving them or we secretly don’t believe we deserve to accomplish them,” says Alice Domar, Ph.D., coauthor of Live a Little!

If your roadblock is… resistance to change..
We know—it’s terrifying to make that first move toward a long-held goal: “Most of us experience discomfort when we break from our routine,” says Jim Loehr, Ed.D., a performance psychologist and the author of The Power of Story. (Free Press). “The trick is to give yourself enough incentives to make tolerating that discomfort worthwhile.” To embrace the new, put yourself through these paces. .

1. Fantasize about your future bliss. Imagine how satisfied you’ll feel when you reach your objective. If you want a more fulfilling job, visualize doing work you’re passionate about. Jot down the specific emotions this achievement would evoke (“I’d feel inspired, not bored, at the office”). “You’re giving yourself some compelling reasons to move forward,” Loehr explains. .

2. Escape the same old, same old. Identify a few novel habits that could help you reach your goal and start integrating them into your schedule. If you want to find a new gig, you could revamp your résumé and resolve to send it to at least one potential employer a week.

3. Make the shift stick. Every morning, reread aloud how you’d feel if you realized your fantasy. Every evening, write down how well you’ve fared with your new habits and record any progress. (You scored an interview!) “This method will help you tie your actions to your goal, which will make your efforts seem producticve and propel you further forward,” Loehr says..

If your roadblock is… perfectionism..
It’s awfully tempting to put off pursuing your goal until you’re better prepared or totally sure you can hit the mark. Unfortunately, that ideal moment may never come. “Perfectionism can be paralyzing,” says Susan Nolen-Hoeksema, author of The Power of Women. (Times Books). Perfectionists tend to have an all-or-nothing view of the world (“I need to drop 20 pounds before I can rock a bikini!”), so it’s important to identify the rewards that come with making even a bit of progress toward your dream, Nolen-Hoeksema explains. (You can still frolic in a two-piece and feel good about your body without dropping two dress sizes.) To do that, write down your aim (e.g., to lose 20 pounds). Then detail how you’d benefit from getting 25 percent, 50 percent or 75 percent of the way there. .

“This exercise will help you value incremental change,” says Nolen-Hoeksema, who advises patting yourself on the back each time you make one stride. “If you don’t reach your initial benchmark, you’ll be able to relish the progress you have made without getting demoralized.”.

If your roadblock is… catastrophizing..
Playing out every possible what-if may seem like a smart way to make absolutely certain that pursuing a goal is advisable, but when you think about all the disasters that could ensue, “you inevitably psych yourself out,” says Jill Bolte Taylor, Ph.D., author of My Stroke of Insight. (Penguin). Instead, get out of your head and into the moment with these tips from Taylor that will help you stop overanalyzing and start acting. .

Doomsday dilemma. I’m freaked out by what could go wrong.
Soothing solution … To prove to yourself that the earth will not shatter if you move forward, take one tiny step toward what you’re striving for, Taylor suggests. Do something unintimidating, such as exploring an aspect of your goal online. (If you want to start a blog about crafting, check out three similar sites.) You’ll get closer to your dream without stressing out. .

Doomsday dilemma. I second-guess myself so much, I’ve stalled.
Soothing solution … Anchor yourself in the present by focusing on the physical sensations you experience when you do something related to reaching your dream: If you’re surfing sites, draw your attention to your breath as you look at a particularly cool webpage. “Immersing yourself in the sensory side of the process will help you get into the flow and focus on what you can do in that moment,” Taylor says. “That creates momentum.”